By Asia Nail
The Truth Reporter
Some couples dance. Some couples hike. Reverend Donald L. Perryman, PhD, and his wife, First Lady Willetta Perryman, cook. And not just a quick throw-something-in-the-microwave kind of cooking. No, they have turned Friday nights into a sacred space where the kitchen is their dance floor, the pots and pans are their instruments and the food is a love letter to one another and the community they serve.
What started as a private tradition of laughter, chopping vegetables, and playing old-school music has grown into Fridays Cooking Together: Ministry, Meals, and Marriage—a new cookbook—and a beloved social media series that brings their joy to the world.
Their story is more than just recipes, it’s a journey of cultivating God’s love as husband and wife, finding joy in the simple moments of life, and showing that even church leaders often need to take off their “pastor hats” to nurture their personal relationships.
And if you’ve ever wondered whether your kitchen could be the center of joy, healing and connection, the Perrymans are here to tell you that it can.
From the Pulpit to the Kitchen
Rev. D.L. Perryman is a leading voice in Toledo as the senior pastor at Center of Hope Community Baptist Church and as a dedicated social justice advocate. Yet he admits that sometimes ministers — and anyone in a caregiving role — lose sight of how to turn off the faucet.
“We often get lost in our civic roles,” he said. “We’re preaching, we’re visiting, we’re serving. And we often forget to laugh, to sit down at the dinner table, to just be.”
First Lady Willetta agrees. “The church takes a great deal of time and energy,” she said. “If you’re not careful, you can lose yourself in it. I didn’t just want to become a First Lady in the church — I also need to be my partner’s wife at home.”
They made a pact, years ago: Friday nights were for each other. No church discussions. No work-related conversations. Just cooking, laughter, music, and being together.
Fridays Cooking Together: A New Rhythm of Love
Picture this: it’s Friday evening. The week has felt long. The phone rings, but unless it’s an emergency, it goes unanswered. Instead, the Perrymans are in the kitchen, enjoying an Isley Brothers’ playlist, and playfully teasing about who cuts vegetables faster while weighing the pros and cons of fish over chicken for dinner.
To them, cooking is more than food, it’s a ministry of love. It’s a way to serve each other before serving the world. And every so often, family members join in, like their kids and granddaughter, drawn by the sweet smells and the sound of laughter.
“It’s sacred time,” said First Lady Willetta. “We prepare the table, light candles and set the mood with music. It’s like a date night at home, but better.”
She laughs as she explains how extreme Dr. Perryman can be. “I’d be happy with an Amazon tablecloth, but he prefers fine linens from Macy’s!”
He smiles. “I want our meals to feel special because she is special.”
The Birth of a Cookbook
The Perrymans never set out to write a cookbook. They were just sharing their Friday night meals online, and pretty soon people started asking for recipes. One day their daughter chatted with an editor, shared photos of their culinary creations and, suddenly, a book deal was on the table.
That’s how Fridays Cooking Together: Ministry, Meals, and Marriage was born.
This isn’t a conventional cookbook, complete with boring recipes and dry instructions. Instead, it offers an experience. Each month has a theme, a story, a prayer, recipes, recommended playlists and even tablescape ideas. Picture turning to a page in April to not only find a menu, but also a meditation, a curated Spotify playlist and tips on how to make your table look fresh for spring.
“It’s not just food,” said Reverend Perryman. “It’s music, mood, memory and meaning.”
First Lady Willetta adds, “You certainly don’t need fancy dishes or gourmet skills. You can light a candle, order Chinese takeout and still create a vibe all at the same time. This cookbook is about connection, not perfection.”
Cooking as a Ministry
Some might ask, what does cooking have to do with church? But for the Perrymans, food and faith have long been intertwined.
Think about it: Jesus spent as much time at tables as he did in temples. He shared meals with friends, celebrated at weddings and used dinner as a setting for teaching and love.
“We saw how our Fridays blessed our marriage,” Rev. Perryman said. “We wanted to share this model with other couples, ministers and families. If we stay grounded in love, then we better serve the people God calls us to serve.”
First Lady Willetta further exemplifies this service as she hosts cooking classes with Center of Hope Family Services. She doesn’t just teach recipes — she arms parents with full meals they can take home, things like casseroles and roasts that can feed the entire family. These classes not only nourish the body, they also feed the community with laughter, connection, and a sense of dignity
“When the adults leave,” she said, “they’re not just leaving with food. They leave with happiness, with a community, with something they can share.”
A Social Media Hit
The Perryman’s weekly cooking sessions are blossoming into a popular online series called Fridays Cooking Together. On Facebook and YouTube, viewers can find them smiling, joking and trading recipes like gumbo, jambalaya and even seared fish.
It’s not curated or staged like a Food Network show — it’s real life. You get Rev. Perryman chopping okra, sometimes more slowly, as First Lady Willetta laughs and guides the process. You’ll hear music in the background, maybe Earth, Wind & Fire, maybe Luther Vandross.
The response has been heartwarming.
Couples have written in to say they have started their own Friday night cooking tradition. Families are saying the book is helping them find new ways to reconnect. Fellow ministers say the Perrymans’ openness shows them it’s okay to step away from ‘always being on,’ unwind, and to even let the kitchen become a place of rest and joy.
Honored at Hampton University
Rev. D.L. and First Lady Willetta Perryman’s work hasn’t just caught the attention of families at home—it’s also made big waves in ministry circles, too. Recently, they were asked to teach at the 13th Annual Church Development and Leadership Academy (CDLA) at the prestigious Hampton University Ministers Conference.
To be recognized at such a respected national gathering was an honor for both of them. More importantly, it was a chance to spread the message: that love, marriage, ministry, and food are all connected—and all holy.
Recipes for Life, Not Just Food
As you scroll through Fridays Cooking Together, you will find menus inspired by First Lady Willetta’s mother, grandmother and aunts. She learned by watching them cook, and by taking in stories that made her laugh, reflect, and feel the bittersweet moments of life.
Those recipes became the soil where she planted her own creativity, updating old classics and experimenting with new culinary dishes.
But the real recipe they are sharing is as follows:
- Pick a day. Protect it fiercely.
- Plan a meal, even if it is simple.
- Set the mood with music, candles or laughter.
- Cook side by side, even if one is chopping while the other is sautéing.
- Pray together. Eat together. Dream together.
It’s not just about food, it’s about feeding the soul.
Changing the Narrative
At the heart of it all, the Perrymans want to change the picture people often paint of Pastors and First Ladies. “We’re not perfect statues living only in church pews. We’re people who laugh, play, dance, and sometimes even debate about table linens,” says the First Lady with a smile.
They want couples to know: you don’t have to sacrifice love for service. In fact, the stronger your love, the better your service.
“We hope more families make time to reconnect,” said Reverend Perryman. “Even if it’s just once a month. Even if it’s just over pizza.”
A Table Big Enough for Everyone
The Perrymans’ table has grown from their kitchen to their congregation, to social media and now into the pages of a cookbook. And like any good table, there’s always room for one more chair.
Whether you’re a pastor, a busy parent, a newlywed, or someone just trying to add more joy to your week, their message is the same: cooking together is really about loving together.
As First Lady Willetta says, “The food is just the bonus. The real meal is the laughter, the music, the stories, and the time spent.”
So set the mood, light the candle, and remember: the table is where stories unfold, hearts connect, and love is served.
Fridays Cooking Together: Ministry, Meals, and Marriage is available now through Kendall Hunt Publishing here. Pull up a chair—you’re invited to the table.
