By Asia Nail
The Truth Reporter
Bernadette Joy Graham’s life is a testament to the power of perseverance and purpose. As a licensed professional clinical counselor (LPCC), she has dedicated her career to helping others navigate grief and mental health challenges, drawing from her own deeply personal experiences. Whether through her private practice, her work with the African American Legacy Project, or her powerful writing, Graham continues to inspire and uplift those around her with her unwavering commitment to healing and hope.
A Mother’s Influence: Colleen, the “Irish Girl”
Graham often speaks about the powerful influence of her mother, Miss Colleen, whose first name fittingly means “Irish girl.” Colleen was of German and Irish descent and brought an indomitable spirit to her family. “My white mother always had mixed children, and she wasn’t to be messed with. She loved all her kids,” Graham shares.
Colleen’s musical talents were another defining part of her life. She sang with her first husband, Jon Hendricks, and performed alongside the legendary Stanley Cowell. These rich cultural experiences deeply shaped Graham’s worldview and her appreciation for her family’s diverse heritage.
Discovering Her Parents at the African American Legacy Project Museum
Graham’s work with the African American Legacy Project (AALP) has been transformative—not just for the community but for herself as well. The organization, led by fellow veteran Robert Smith, is dedicated to preserving and sharing the stories of African Americans in Northwest Ohio.
During one visit to the AALP Museum, Graham had a profoundly moving experience. “I was walking around, and I saw both my parents,” she recalls. “I was surprised mostly to see photos of my white mother.” This unexpected encounter reaffirmed her pride in her family’s story and her commitment to honoring their legacy.
Grief as a Catalyst for Healing
Tragedy struck when Graham lost her mother at just 14 years old, during her freshman year at St. Ursula Academy. “Losing my mom was like having the floor ripped out from under me,” she recalled. “There were no grief counselors or safe spaces to talk about it back then.”
But instead of breaking her, this loss became a turning point. It planted the seed for her passion for grief counseling and mental health. “I wanted to be the person I needed when I was younger,” she said. “Someone who could help people navigate their pain and come out stronger on the other side.”
Pioneering Grief and Bereavement Work
“When someone has lost a loved one, I always tell them to stop asking themselves why. You’ll never know why, but one day you’ll know the reason,” she shares. “I needed my mom at 14 when she passed, but now I know the reason I went through this experience. If my mother wouldn’t have died at that time, I wouldn’t now be helping so many others get through their personal loss.”
Her contributions to the field are significant. “I started the grief and bereavement division with the American Counseling Association,” she says proudly. “Now there is so much research on grief and bereavement, whereas before, there was hardly any information—one of my greatest accomplishments.”
Graham also emphasizes that grief isn’t just about death. “We lose a lot of things throughout our life—jobs, money, time and health. When one big one drops, it takes us to our knees. No one teaches us how to take a loss, only how to gain—how to gain education, get a job or start a family.”
Making Mental Health Care Accessible
Bernadette is passionate about ensuring that everyone has access to mental health care, no matter their circumstances. She offers practical advice for finding the right provider.
“PsychologyToday.com is a national website,” she explains. “First, filter by your insurance so you don’t have to pay out of pocket. Then you can filter to find a doctor by gender, religious preferences, and many specific categories. Doctors also list their specialties; for instance, I specialize in grief and bereavement, anxiety, and depression.”
To address the broader issue of access, Graham is creating workshops to educate people about their healthcare options. “People just don’t know this,” she says. “I’m working on creating workshops to educate employees and employers on how to utilize their healthcare and mental health services better. Most people just don’t know how to navigate this well.”
She also highlights the lack of mental health resources at health fairs. “Most providers focus on physical ailments affecting the Black community, like diabetes and high blood pressure, but they rarely have information on mental health,” Bernadette notes. “Everything starts in your mind. If you don’t have your mind in check, it can actually be the root cause of physical ailments.”
Care for All, No Matter Their Situation
Graham’s dedication to her patients goes beyond standard practices. She ensures that those in need receive care, regardless of their financial or insurance situation.
For example, she offers a sliding scale for therapy services. “I’d rather my patients get help and pay something, even if it’s not much, as opposed to receiving no mental health help at all,” she explains.
Breaking Stigmas in the Black Community
One of Graham’s most impactful initiatives is her monthly column, A Mental Health Moment, right here at our own Sojourner’s Truth Newspaper. Through her writing, she aims to break down the stigma surrounding mental health therapy in the Black community.
“In our community, there is a serious stigma against mental health therapy,” she says. “That’s why I started my column. The more education I provide, the more we can encourage understanding and acceptance.”
Advice for Navigating Loss
Graham offers simple yet profound advice for those dealing with grief. She encourages people to honor their loved ones in a way that feels meaningful to them, especially during tough times like the holidays.
“Feel your feelings—don’t bottle it up,” she says. “Honor them in your own way.”
Following Her Heart
Graham’s favorite quote, “Follow your heart and chase your dreams, one day you’ll catch up because you will always be on the right path,” encapsulates her life’s journey.
From honoring her parents’ legacy to forging new paths in mental health care, Bernadette Joy Graham is a shining example of resilience, compassion, and hope. Her dedication reminds us that healing is not just a personal journey but a gift we can share with the world. Thank you for continuing to inspire others to heal, dream, and chase their own paths to fulfillment.
For More Read: ’A Mental Health Moment’ here